Return-Path: Delivered-To: DAVID@TRANSOCEAN.COM Received: from vps.transocean.com by vps.transocean.com (Dovecot) with LMTP id +eGcFSQ3mFnACwAAInt2oQ for ; Sat, 19 Aug 2017 06:03:32 -0700 Return-path: Envelope-to: DAVID@TRANSOCEAN.COM Delivery-date: Sat, 19 Aug 2017 06:03:32 -0700 Received: from mail188.atl121.mcsv.net ([198.2.131.188]:61670) by vps.transocean.com with esmtp (Exim 4.89) (envelope-from ) id 1dj3PL-0000nc-64 for DAVID@TRANSOCEAN.COM; Sat, 19 Aug 2017 06:03:32 -0700 DKIM-Signature: v=1; a=rsa-sha256; c=relaxed/relaxed; s=k1; d=mail188.atl121.mcsv.net; h=Subject:From:Reply-To:To:Date:Message-ID:List-ID:List-Unsubscribe:Sender: Content-Type:MIME-Version; i=bjbueno=3Dcultbranding.com@mail188.atl121.mcsv.net; bh=mLJuYy0fC3B3gndex+m4R+7Mb1pIwjfAVTmfu8Gut/Q=; b=h6m6HbgOhZgCnNl9li3Tbc5iD/67+MusrkvO0VCzFxzI+bZkJkURBgpQwOeHL2YHGJZZlhYt+uuL ch5Gd1WDFEMmQUxMQNZO5MGyBVpF1ZeiYTlcwrXqSVKXQYm0JIAUG3Zg3CFGePlg+ajC8vP4A9a2 H2BWSYEUFNSf23xL0DI= Received: from (127.0.0.1) by mail188.atl121.mcsv.net id hj0rhc2akecq for ; Sat, 19 Aug 2017 13:02:35 +0000 (envelope-from ) Subject: =?utf-8?Q?Ten=20Strategies=20for=20Using=20Emotional=20Intelligence=20to=20Become=20a=20Transformative=20Leader?= From: =?utf-8?Q?The=20Cult=20Branding=20Blog?= Reply-To: =?utf-8?Q?The=20Cult=20Branding=20Blog?= To: =?utf-8?Q?David?= Date: Sat, 19 Aug 2017 13:02:35 +0000 Message-ID: X-Mailer: MailChimp Mailer - **CIDe6836e7cff4ed9cf398d** X-Campaign: mailchimpc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066.e6836e7cff X-campaignid: mailchimpc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066.e6836e7cff X-Report-Abuse: Please report abuse for this campaign here: http://www.mailchimp.com/abuse/abuse.phtml?u=c006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=e6836e7cff&e=4ed9cf398d X-MC-User: c006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066 Feedback-ID: 1167109:1167109.2915185:us1:mc List-ID: c006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066mc list X-Accounttype: pd List-Unsubscribe: , List-Unsubscribe-Post: List-Unsubscribe=One-Click Sender: "The Cult Branding Blog" x-mcda: FALSE Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="_----------=_MCPart_69541466" MIME-Version: 1.0 X-Spam-Status: No, score=-1.6 X-Spam-Score: -15 X-Spam-Bar: - X-Ham-Report: Spam detection software, running on the system "vps.transocean.com", has NOT identified this incoming email as spam. The original message has been attached to this so you can view it or label similar future email. If you have any questions, see root\@localhost for details. Content preview: ** Ten Strategies for Using Emotional Intelligence to Become a Transformative Leader (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=c006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=2c35a1c778&e=4ed9cf398d) By BJ Bueno When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity. —Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=c006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=72a17375a9&e=4ed9cf398d) [...] Content analysis details: (-1.6 points, 3.0 required) pts rule name description ---- ---------------------- -------------------------------------------------- 0.0 URIBL_BLOCKED ADMINISTRATOR NOTICE: The query to URIBL was blocked. See http://wiki.apache.org/spamassassin/DnsBlocklists#dnsbl-block for more information. [URIs: mailchimp.com] 0.0 HEADER_FROM_DIFFERENT_DOMAINS From and EnvelopeFrom 2nd level mail domains are different -0.0 SPF_PASS SPF: sender matches SPF record -0.0 SPF_HELO_PASS SPF: HELO matches SPF record -0.0 RP_MATCHES_RCVD Envelope sender domain matches handover relay domain 0.0 HTML_MESSAGE BODY: HTML included in message -1.9 BAYES_00 BODY: Bayes spam probability is 0 to 1% [score: 0.0000] 0.0 MIME_QP_LONG_LINE RAW: Quoted-printable line longer than 76 chars -0.1 DKIM_VALID Message has at least one valid DKIM or DK signature 0.1 DKIM_SIGNED Message has a DKIM or DK signature, not necessarily valid 0.2 KAM_LOTSOFHASH Emails with lots of hash-like gibberish X-Spam-Flag: NO This is a multi-part message in MIME format --_----------=_MCPart_69541466 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8"; format="fixed" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable ** Ten Strategies for Using Emotional Intelligence to Become a Transformat= ive Leader (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bb= dcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3D2c35a1c778&e=3D4ed9cf398d) ------------------------------------------------------------ By BJ Bueno When dealing with people=2C let us remember we are not dealing with creatu= res of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion=2C creatures bristl= ing with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity. =E2=80=94Dale Carnegie=2C How to Win Friends and Influence People (http://= cultbranding.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066= &id=3D72a17375a9&e=3D4ed9cf398d) _______________________ When we think of leaders=2C we usually picture some larger-than-life perso= n known for their ability to create transformation and inspire others to t= ake up their cause.^1 (#fn-9958-1) These transformative leaders can be gre= at role models=2C but they can also create a feeling that great leadership= is beyond the grasp of most people.^2 (#fn-9958-2) You may not create a movement like Mahatma Gandhi=2C but you can achieve t= ransformative leadership. Transformative leadership starts with a big visi= on (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage2.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f= 0420f9c7a066&id=3Da68398a5a5&e=3D4ed9cf398d) of what you want yourse= lf and your company to become. Although motivated by passion (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage.com/tra= ck/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3Dc4200ade3a&e=3D= 4ed9cf398d) =2C creating a vision is the domain of cognitive skills. Cognitive skil= ls are important=2C but just possessing great cognitive skill does not gua= rantee the successful implementation and acceptance of your vision. These cognitive skills are only one element of what psychologist Robert J.= Sternberg termed =E2=80=9Csuccessful intelligence.=E2=80=9D Another equal= ly important element is what he called =E2=80=9Cpractical intelligence.=E2= =80=9D In Sternberg=E2=80=99s words: =E2=80=9CPractical intelligence invol= ves applying the components of intelligence to experience so as to a) adap= t=2C b) shape=2C and c) select environments.=E2=80=9D^3 (#fn-9958-3) In other words=2C practical intelligence involves the ability to change yo= ur own attitudes=2C change the environment to maximize the potential accep= tance of the change you want to implement=2C and know when to move on afte= r recognizing that the environment is unsuitable for the change you want t= o implement. This practical intelligence is key in implementing and gaining acceptance= for your vision. But=2C it isn=E2=80=99t the most helpful place to start.= Another type of intelligence gives you skills to successfully adapt and s= hape the environment. This type of intelligence has gained popularity in t= he business world=2C but it is often misused and misunderstood. The type o= f intelligence I=E2=80=99m referring to is emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence found a wide audience after Daniel Goleman publishe= d Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (http://cultbrand= ing.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3D125= 5d44366&e=3D4ed9cf398d) in 1995 and it became of interest to the bu= siness community after Goleman contextualized it in terms of leadership wi= th his 1998 article =E2=80=9CWhat Makes a Leader?=E2=80=9D (http://cultbra= nding.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3D0= 64c5d6d2e&e=3D4ed9cf398d) in the Harvard Business Review. Goleman=E2= =80=99s work was influenced by psychologists John D. Mayer and Peter Salov= ey=E2=80=99s seminal 1990 paper =E2=80=9CEmotional Intelligence=E2=80=9D (= http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage2.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420= f9c7a066&id=3D32edcfa8c5&e=3D4ed9cf398d) from the journal Imaginatio= n=2C Cognition and Personality. The Goleman and Mayer/Salovey interpretations of emotional intelligence re= main two of the leading models=E2=80=94with Goleman=E2=80=99s model having= more widespread use in the practical=2C business world and the Mayer/Salo= vey model being more widespread in the academic world. Both of these model= s share much in common: 1) They both see emotional intelligence as a mix o= f self-management and relationship-management; and=2C 2) they both see emo= tional intelligence as perceiving emotions=E2=80=94both in oneself and in= others=E2=80=94and being able to work with those emotions in a positive w= ay=E2=80=94regulating the emotions in oneself and adapting approaches to t= he emotional states and tendencies of others.^4 (#fn-9958-4) ^5 (#fn-9958-= 5) Emotional intelligence is not about being able to turn off or suppress emo= tions; that=E2=80=99s impossible. Instead=2C emotional intelligence is abo= ut recognizing emotions and emotional tendencies so that you are not domin= ated by them=2C don=E2=80=99t identify with them=2C and that you can respo= nd to them and use them in constructive ways.^6 (#fn-9958-6) There will be times when all leaders behave in ways that are not ideal. Bu= t=2C having emotional intelligence allows you to dampen the long-term dama= ging consequences. Eric Ripert=2C a buddhist=2C one of the world=E2=80=99s great chefs=2C and= co-owner of Le Bernardin=E2=80=94only one of three restaurants in New Yor= k to have both 3 Michelin stars and four stars from The New York Times=E2= =80=94exemplifies what it=E2=80=99s like to manage with emotional intellig= ence. On Dan Harris=E2=80=99s =E2=80=9C10% Happier=E2=80=9D (http://cultbr= anding.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3D= fbf6e060d7&e=3D4ed9cf398d) podcast Ripert commented about what happe= ns when he behaves in ways that are not ideal: Sometimes I=E2=80=99m frustrated. When I=E2=80=99m frustrated=2C I may not= be happy. Like I said=2C I=E2=80=99m not a screamer=2C but I may be sarca= stic when I=E2=80=99m addressing to you my critiques. I may be very irrita= ted. But=2C what I do after=E2=80=94when the incident has passed=E2=80=94I= go back and I apologize on the front of everyone. I have no problem to ap= ologize on the front of my staff for not behaving the proper way. And=2C t= hat I think I teach that to all the sous chefs: whoever has responsibility= in the restaurant has to do that. And=2C I think it makes us stronger bec= ause being angry =2C it=E2=80=99s a weakness. It=E2=80=99s not a quality.= Someone who=E2=80=99s screaming and someone who=E2=80=99s violent is not= someone who=E2=80=99s stronger than someone who=E2=80=99s not. It=E2=80= =99s someone who has issues and someone who has not mastered himself. Emotional intelligence is also not about taking on other people=E2=80=99s= emotions and trying to please everyone. Instead=2C it means considering o= thers=E2=80=99 feelings as part of the process of making informed decision= s.^7 (#fn-9958-7) In short=2C as emotional intelligence expert Travis Bradberry writes: =E2= =80=9CEmotional intelligence is the ability to make emotions work for you= instead of against you.=E2=80=9D^8 (#fn-9958-8) 10 Strategies For Developing Your Emotional Intelligence It is not a matter of whether leaders are born or made. They are born and= made. =E2=80=94Jay Conger^9 (#fn-9958-9) Emotional intelligence is something that increases throughout one=E2=80=99= s lifetime.^10 (#fn-9958-10) But=2C it can be accelerated through a concer= ted effort. Here are ten strategies for developing your emotional intelligence: 1. Study Your Feelings: Learn your emotional patterns and what triggers th= em. Understanding your default tendencies allows you effectively respond= to any situation. 2. Practice Empathy: Cultivate your ability to both understand others=E2= =80=99 emotions and encourage people to share their perspectives and feedb= ack. By making active attempts to listen to and understand others=2C you w= ill be better equipped to deal with a wide range of people in a wide range= of situations. As Ernest Hemmingway noted: =E2=80=9CWhen people talk list= en completely. Most people never really listen.=E2=80=9D^11 (#fn-9958-11) 3. Give Specific Praise: Never give vague praise. Instead=2C make it speci= fic to the person and deliver it in terms that the person can relate to. B= y making praise specific=2C you show that you understand them. 4. Apologize And Forgive: Apologizing is a sign of strength; it shows peop= le that you are not ruled by emotional whims. Forgiving others not only ea= ses their burden and allows them to be better performers but it also helps= you not become fixated on the past so you can better manage the present a= nd future. 5. Continually Learn: The more you learn the more you can grow. Emotional= intelligence isn=E2=80=99t about a destination but about continual growth= =2E 6. Take Time To Pause: Before you respond=2C take a pause to better unders= tand all the dynamics of a situation. By taking a pause=2C you are better= equipped to respond in a way that takes into account the emotional states= and inclinations of everyone present. 7. Nurture Relationships: Cultivating relationships gives you practical ex= perience in dealing with a wide range of people. Not only will developing= these relationships improve your outlook=2C but it will also make you bet= ter equipped to deal with people you=E2=80=99ve never met before. 8. Give Direct=2C Constructive Feedback: Beating around the bush can intro= duce unwanted and potentially negative emotions into a situation and relat= ionship. By being direct and constructive=2C nothing is left unsaid that m= ay cloud current and future interactions. 9. Don=E2=80=99t Blame Others: Nobody but yourself should be the master of= your emotions. If people aren=E2=80=99t responding the way you want=2C in= stead of blaming them=2C consider how you might alter your approach=E2=80= =94taking into account their emotional states and tendencies=E2=80=94to th= e situation to make them receptive. 10. Practice Breathing: Breathing exercises can both help you clear your m= ind and stimulate you for the work ahead. Here are two great ones from And= rew Weil to get you started: 1. + The Relaxing Breath: This breathing technique will clear your mind and p= ut you at ease. Start by pressing the tip of your tongue against the top o= f your mouth=2C right behind the front teeth. Exhale through the mouth. In= hale for a count of four through the nose. Hold your breath for a count of= seven. Exhale=2C making noise=2C for a count of eight through the mouth.= Repeat three times. + The Stimulating Breath: You=E2=80=99ve cleared your mind=2C now it=E2=80= =99s time to stimulate your mind for the creative work ahead. Close your m= outh. Rapidly inhale and exhale through your nose. Aim for about three bre= aths per second. Continue this for fifteen seconds. With time=2C you can i= ncrease the duration.^12 (#fn-9958-12) _______________________ 1. Susan Krauss Whitebourne=2C =E2=80=9CUnlock Your Emotional Genius: How= emotionally intelligent are you=2C and why should you care? (http://cultb= randing.us1.list-manage1.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id= =3D170f564b5b&e=3D4ed9cf398d) =2C=E2=80=9D PsychologyToday.com=2C 20= 13. =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-1) 2. Jay A. Conger=2C =E2=80=9CDeveloping leadership capability: What=E2=80= =99s inside the black box? (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage1.com/track= /click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3Dfef209660c&e=3D4ed9cf398d)= =2C=E2=80=9D Academy of Management Perspectives=2C 2004. =E2=86=A9 (#fnre= f-9958-2) 3. Robert J. Sternberg=2C =E2=80=9CThe Theory of Successful intelligence= (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f042= 0f9c7a066&id=3Dcaacf0a600&e=3D4ed9cf398d) =2C=E2=80=9D Interamerican= Journal of Psychology=2C 2005. =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-3) 4. John D. Mayer=2C Peter Salovey=2C and David R. Caruso=2C =E2=80=9CEmot= ional Intelligence: Theory=2C Findings=2C and Implications (http://cultbra= nding.us1.list-manage2.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3D= 8dbdf5f06c&e=3D4ed9cf398d) =2C=E2=80=9D Psychological Inquiry=2C 200= 4. =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-4) 5. Daniel Goleman=2C =E2=80=9CWhat Makes a Leader? (http://cultbranding.u= s1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3D1c11faf6= 54&e=3D4ed9cf398d) =2C=E2=80=9D Harvard Business Review=2C 1998. =E2= =86=A9 (#fnref-9958-5) 6. Rob Kendall=2C =E2=80=9CHow to Manage Your Emotions: The life lesson w= e should have been taught at school (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage.c= om/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3D9e64f00a67&e=3D= 4ed9cf398d) =2C=E2=80=9D PsychologyToday.com=2C 2017. =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-= 6) 7. Goleman. =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-7) 8. Travis Bradberry=2C =E2=80=9CEmotional Intelligence =E2=80=93 EQ (http= ://cultbranding.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a= 066&id=3Dda22988ab0&e=3D4ed9cf398d) =2C=E2=80=9D Forbes.com=2C 2014.= =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-8) 9. Conger. =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-9) 10. Zafrul Allam=2C =E2=80=9CEmotional Intelligence At Workplace: A Psycho= logical Review (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage1.com/track/click?u=3Dc= 006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3Dd3ed5a0f14&e=3D4ed9cf398d) =2C=E2=80= =9D Global Management Review=2C 2011. =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-10) 11. Malcolm Cowley=2C =E2=80=9CA Portrait of Mister Papa=2C=E2=80=9D LIFE= =2C 1949. =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-11) 12. Andrew Weil=2C Breathing: The Master Key to Self Healing (http://cultb= randing.us1.list-manage2.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id= =3D0cf43b8ec3&e=3D4ed9cf398d) =2C 1999. =E2=86=A9 (#fnref-9958-12) http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage1.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420= f9c7a066&id=3D9656e0ad06&e=3D4ed9cf398d http://cultbranding.us1.list= -manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3Dbebf5ff9fe&e=3D= 4ed9cf398d http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage.com/track/click?u=3Dc= 006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3Dd859091292&e=3D4ed9cf398d =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D Copyright =C2=A9 2017 The Cult Branding Company=2C All rights reserved. Your subscribed to our mailing list via www.CultBranding.com. Our mailing address is: The Cult Branding Company PO Box 470212 Celebration=2C Florida 34747-9992 USA ** unsubscribe from this list (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage1.com/un= subscribe?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3Dc5a4b39495&e=3D4ed9cf398d&c=3De= 6836e7cff) ** update subscription preferences (http://cultbranding.us1.list-manage.co= m/profile?u=3Dc006bbdcbd27f0420f9c7a066&id=3Dc5a4b39495&e=3D4ed9cf398d) --_----------=_MCPart_69541466 Content-Type: text/html; charset="utf-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable =09 Ten Strategies for Using Emotional Intelligence to Become a= Transformative Leader
=09
<= /td>

Ten Strategies for Using Emotional Intelligence to Become a T= ransformative Leader

By BJ Bueno

When dealing with people= =2C let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dea= ling with creatures of emotion=2C creatures bristling with prejudices and= motivated by pride and vanity.
=E2=80=94Dale Carnegie=2C H= ow to Win Friends and Influence People

_______________________

When we think of leader= s=2C we usually picture some larger-than-life person known for their abili= ty to create transformation and inspire others to take up their cause.1 These transformative leader= s can be great role models=2C but they can also create a feeling that grea= t leadership is beyond the grasp of most people.2

You may not create a mo= vement like Mahatma Gandhi=2C but you can achieve transformative leadershi= p. Transformative leadership starts with a= big vision of what you want yourself and your company to become.

Although motivated by passion=2C creating a vision is the domain= of cognitive skills. Cognitive skills are important=2C but just possessin= g great cognitive skill does not guarantee the successful implementation a= nd acceptance of your vision.

These cognitive skills= are only one element of what psychologist Robert J. Sternberg termed =E2= =80=9Csuccessful intelligence.=E2=80=9D Another equally important element= is what he called =E2=80=9Cpractical intelligence.=E2=80=9D In Sternberg= =E2=80=99s words: =E2=80=9CPractical intelligence involves applying the co= mponents of intelligence to experience so as to a) adapt=2C b) shape=2C an= d c) select environments.=E2=80=9D= 3

In other words=2C pract= ical intelligence involves the ability to change your own attitudes=2C cha= nge the environment to maximize the potential acceptance of the change you= want to implement=2C and know when to move on after recognizing that the= environment is unsuitable for the change you want to implement.

This practical intellig= ence is key in implementing and gaining acceptance for your vision. But=2C= it isn=E2=80=99t the most helpful place to start. Another type of intelli= gence gives you skills to successfully adapt and shape the environment. Th= is type of intelligence has gained popularity in the business world=2C but= it is often misused and misunderstood. The type of intelligence I=E2=80= =99m referring to is emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence= found a wide audience after Daniel Goleman published Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than I= Q=C2=A0in 1995 and it became of interest to the business community= after Goleman contextualized it in terms of leadership with his 1998 arti= cle =E2=80=9CWhat Makes a Leader?= =E2=80=9D in the Harvard Business Review. Goleman=E2=80=99s wor= k was influenced by psychologists John D. Mayer and Peter Salovey=E2=80=99= s seminal 1990 paper =E2=80= =9CEmotional Intelligence=E2=80=9D from the journal Imagination=2C= Cognition and Personality.

The Goleman and Mayer/S= alovey interpretations of emotional intelligence remain two of the leading= models=E2=80=94with Goleman=E2=80=99s model having more widespread use in= the practical=2C business world and the Mayer/Salovey model being more wi= despread in the academic world. Both of these models share much in common:= 1) They both see emotional intelligence as a mix of self-management and r= elationship-management; and=2C 2) they both see emotional intelligence as= perceiving emotions=E2=80=94both in oneself and in others=E2=80=94and bei= ng able to work with those emotions in a positive way=E2=80=94regulating t= he emotions in oneself and adapting approaches to the emotional states and= tendencies of others.4 <= sup class=3D"footnote">5

Emotional intelligence= is not about being able to turn off or suppress emotions; that=E2=80=99s= impossible. Instead=2C emotional intelligence is about recognizing emotio= ns and emotional tendencies so that you are not dominated by them=2C don= =E2=80=99t identify with them=2C and that you can respond to them and use= them in constructive ways.6

There will be times whe= n all leaders behave in ways that are not ideal. But=2C having emotional i= ntelligence allows you=C2=A0to dampen the long-term damaging consequences.=

Eric Ripert=2C a buddhi= st=2C one of the world=E2=80=99s great chefs=2C and co-owner of Le Bernard= in=E2=80=94only one of three restaurants in New York to have both 3 Michel= in stars and four stars from The New York Times=E2=80=94exemplifies= what it=E2=80=99s like to manage with emotional intelligence. On Dan Harr= is=E2=80=99s =E2=80=9C10% Happier=E2= =80=9D podcast Ripert commented about what happens when he behaves in= ways that are not ideal:

Sometimes I=E2=80=99m frustr= ated. When I=E2=80=99m frustrated=2C I may not be happy. Like I said=2C I= =E2=80=99m not a screamer=2C but I may be sarcastic when I=E2=80=99m addre= ssing to you my critiques. I may be very irritated. But=2C what I do after= =E2=80=94when the incident has passed=E2=80=94I go back and I apologize on= the front of everyone. I have no problem to apologize on the front of my= staff for not behaving the proper way. And=2C that I think I teach that t= o all the sous chefs: whoever has responsibility in the restaurant has to= do that. And=2C I think it makes us stronger because being angry =2C it= =E2=80=99s a weakness. It=E2=80=99s not a quality. Someone who=E2=80=99s s= creaming and someone who=E2=80=99s violent is not someone who=E2=80=99s st= ronger than someone who=E2=80=99s not. It=E2=80=99s someone who has issues= and someone who has not mastered himself.

Emotional intelligence= is also not about taking on other people=E2=80=99s emotions and trying to= please everyone. Instead=2C it means considering others=E2=80=99 feelings= as part of the process of making informed decisions.7

In short=2C as emotiona= l intelligence expert Travis Bradberry writes: =E2=80=9CEmotional intellig= ence is the ability to make emotions work for you instead of against you.= =E2=80=9D8

10 Strategies For De= veloping Your Emotional Intelligence

It is not a matter of whe= ther leaders are born or made. They are born and made.
=E2=80=94Jay Conger9

Emotional intelligence= is something that increases throughout one=E2=80=99s lifetime.10 But=2C it can be accelerated t= hrough a concerted effort.

Here are ten strategies= for developing your emotional intelligence:

  1. Study Your Feelings: Learn your emotional patterns and= what triggers them. Understanding your default=C2=A0 tendencies allows you effectively respond to any= situation.
  2. Practice Empathy: Cultivate your ability to both under= stand others=E2=80=99 emotions and encourage people to share their perspec= tives and feedback. By making active attempts to listen to and understand= others=2C you will be better equipped to deal with a wide range of people= in a wide range of situations. As Ernest Hemmingway noted: =E2=80=9CWhen= people talk listen completely. Most people never really listen.=E2=80=9D<= sup class=3D"footnote">11
  3. Give Specific Praise: Never give vague praise. Instead= =2C make it specific to the person and deliver it in terms that the person= can relate to. By making praise specific=2C you show that you understand= them.
  4. Apologize And Forgive: Apologizing is a sign of streng= th; it shows people that you are not ruled by emotional whims. Forgiving o= thers not only eases their burden and allows them to be better performers= but it also helps you not become fixated on the past so you can better ma= nage the present and future.
  5. Continually Learn: The more you learn the more you can= grow. Emotional intelligence isn=E2=80=99t about a destination but about= continual growth.
  6. Take Time To Pause: Before you respond=2C take a pause= to better understand all the dynamics of a situation. By taking a pause= =2C you are better equipped to respond in a way that takes into account th= e emotional states and inclinations of everyone present.
  7. Nurture Relationships: Cultivating relationships gives= you practical experience in dealing with a wide range of people. Not only= will developing these relationships improve your outlook=2C but it will a= lso make you better equipped to deal with people you=E2=80=99ve never met= before.
  8. Give Direct=2C Constructive Feedback: Beating around t= he bush can introduce unwanted and potentially negative emotions into a si= tuation and relationship. By being direct and constructive=2C nothing is l= eft unsaid that may cloud current and future interactions.
  9. Don=E2=80=99t Blame Others: Nobody but yourself should= be the master of your emotions. If people aren=E2=80=99t responding the w= ay you want=2C instead of blaming them=2C consider how you might alter you= r approach=E2=80=94taking into account their emotional states and tendenci= es=E2=80=94to the situation to make them receptive.
  10. Practice Breathing: Breathing exercises can both help= you clear your mind and stimulate you for the work ahead. Here are two gr= eat ones from Andrew Weil to get you started:
    • The Relaxing Breath: This breathing technique will cle= ar your mind and put you at ease. Start by pressing the tip of your tongue= against the top of your mouth=2C right behind the front teeth. Exhale thr= ough the mouth. Inhale for a count of four through the nose. Hold your bre= ath for a count of seven. Exhale=2C making noise=2C for a count of eight t= hrough the mouth. Repeat three times.
    • The Stimulating Breath: You=E2=80=99ve cleared your mi= nd=2C now it=E2=80=99s time to stimulate your mind for the creative work a= head. Close your mouth. Rapidly inhale and exhale through your nose. Aim f= or about three breaths per second. Continue this for fifteen seconds. With= time=2C you can increase the duration.12

_______________________

  1. Susan Krauss Whitebourne=2C =E2=80=9CUnlock Your Emotional Genius: How emotionally intelligen= t are you=2C and why should you care?=2C”=C2=A0PsychologyTod= ay.com=2C 2013. ↩
  2. Jay A. Conger=2C “Developing leadership capability: What’s inside the black box?= =2C”=C2=A0Academy of Management Perspectives=2C 2004. <= span class=3D"footnotereverse">↩<= /span>
  3. =C2=A0Robert J. Sternberg=2C =E2=80=9CThe Theory of Successful intelligence=2C=E2=80=9D Interamerican Journal of Psychology=2C 2005. ↩
  4. =C2=A0John D. Mayer=2C Peter Salovey=2C and David R. Carus= o=2C =E2=80=9CEmotional Intelligen= ce: Theory=2C Findings=2C and Implications=2C=E2=80=9D Psychologic= al Inquiry=2C 2004. ↩
  5. =C2=A0Daniel Goleman=2C =E2=80=9CWhat Makes a Leader?=2C=E2=80=9D Harvard Business Re= view=2C 1998. ↩
  6. =C2=A0Rob Kendall=2C =E2=80=9CHow to Manage Your Emotions: The life lesson we should have been= taught at school=2C=E2=80=9D PsychologyToday.com=2C 2017. ↩
  7. Goleman. ↩
  8. =C2=A0Travis Bradberry=2C =E2=80=9CEmotional Intelligence – EQ=2C=E2=80=9D Fo= rbes.com=2C 2014. ↩
  9. Conger. ↩
  10. Zafrul Allam=2C =E2=80=9CEmotional Intelligence At Workplace: A Psychological Review=2C= =E2=80=9D Global Management Review=2C 2011. ↩
  11. =C2=A0Malcolm Cowley=2C =E2=80=9CA Portrait of Mister Pap= a=2C=E2=80=9D LIFE=2C 1949. ↩
  12. Andrew Weil=2C=C2=A0Breathing: The Master Key to Self Healing=2C 1999. ↩=


3D"Like
=
Copyright =C2=A9 2017 The Cult Branding Co= mpany=2C All rights reserved.
Your subscribed to our mailing list via www.CultBranding.com.

Our mailing address is:
The Cult Branding Company<= /span>
PO Box 470212
= Celebration=2C Flor= ida 34747-9992

Add us to your address bo= ok


unsubscribe from this list    --_----------=_MCPart_69541466--